The main feature of life lies in our relationships. Our relationships make us see our life from the reflection of others. However, because we are dealing with people, problems are inevitable. While I am a firm believer that every relationship can be worked on, you must be aware of when it is time to let a relationship go. The Bible has a lot of relationship problems bible verses, but this post will only list 5 of them and how I can relate to them.
Humans are social beings.
Relationship problems bible verse 1: James 3:16
One of the root causes of so many relationship problems is envy and selfishness. You can envy someone and strive to be like them, but it becomes a problem when you actively seek ways to bring down such a person either to take their place or not. You don’t want to wake up one day and realize that you have become such a person that would consider nobody just to see their ambitions come alive.
It is important to understand that envy and self-seeking can lead to so many untold problems. It is very easy to find yourself envying another person. But you must be very careful that you don’t find yourself with people in your circle that are either envious or self-seeking, it never ends well. When you notice that you are envious of another person, or you can’t seem to see anything good in another person it’s time to begin to consider reevaluating the essence of that relationship and if you should keep investing yourself in the relationship.
“For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.”- James 3:16
Relationship problems bible Verse 2: Philippians 4: 6
I believe that if there is a man to pray, there is a God to listen. Irrespective of the extent of the problem with anyone, this is your reminder to pray. You must understand that the first problem you need to deal with in the event of a falling out is your anxiety. Remember, you can only control your response to a situation, not how the situation plays out. I am a firm believer that you don’t meet people by chance and there is a predestined reason for meeting someone as such when there is a falling out, you are supposed to pray about it to decide your reaction.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” – Philippians 4:6
Relationship problems bible verse 3: James 1:19-20
The most common hindrance to reconciliation most times is what has been said. The words spoken to an individual can stay with them for years and become an obstacle to mending fences. In the time of pain and anger, it’s important to learn how to not speak at all or better still be cautious of what is said. This relationship bible verse brings to light how important it is to be a good listener. A relationship problem does not happen overnight, it becomes a problem when one or both parties have refused to listen over time.
Everyone has an innate need to be heard, especially by those they consider most important to them. The icing on the cake that grows relationship problems is anger. While I will not say don’t get angry because, in my opinion, I believe every normal person gets angry, you should learn to manage your anger instead.
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” – James 1:19-20
Relationship problems bible verse 4: Philippians 2:3-4
In my experience, I have realized that it is easier to blame someone else for a falling out than to have proper self-reflection. On a journey of self-realization, you would be amazed at what you would find. A lot of people are selfish and self-centred and wonder why their relationships fail. I remember the words of my brother, he said to me, friendship is a sacrifice. Instead of staying angry at someone for things they didn’t do for you, have you considered if you are not a receiver in that relationship?
It’s not only about you, when you are in a relationship consider how to match the energy. We will not always be able to match each other but no matter how small we are; we can give in our capacity without any selfish reasons or interest.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your interests but each of you to the interests of the others.”- Philippians 2:3-4
Relationship problems bible verse 5: Colossians 3:13
There are a lot of things that come with relationship problems. While we can go on and on about who is right and wrong, you must bring yourself to a place where you let go of the hurt and forgive. You forgive not because the person has realized how they treated you wrong but because you don’t want to see the world from the lens of the hurt. You want to enjoy your life on your terms not on the terms of what someone else has done to you in the past.
When you don’t forgive you generalize to other people and continue to relieve the hurt that you just went through missing out on what could have been with someone else.
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”- Colossians 3:13
It is easy to blame your relationship problems on someone else other than yourself. However, you need to start looking within and if you are a Christian arm yourself with relationship problems and bible verses to keep your head above the water. You can find more relationship bible verses here. Not a Christian, comment on tips about solving relationship problems.